Society’s Script Isn’t Your Story
When the path of “should” collides with the truth inside you.
There were many times in my life where I had to make a choice: follow the expectations or go off script and follow what I knew to be right in my heart and my gut, even if I didn’t know why.
One of these times was during my divorce.
My boys were 12 and for most of their lives it was just them and me, as their dad travelled a lot for work.
Society dictated that after divorce, the children typically stayed with the mom, and dad provided financial support. I could have chosen this route, but in my heart, and for many other reasons, I knew it wasn’t the right choice in our situation.
They were old enough that we let them decide who they wanted to live with. He outwardly worked on convincing them to choose him, and I didn’t stop him. And as painful as I knew it would be for me, I knew in my heart that would be best for them.
I also knew that they were enough like me that a fresh start like this would be very enticing. This would be an opportunity for them to go somewhere new, start over and be whoever they wanted. As identical twins, this was a perfect way for them to really become individuals.
There were plenty of other times in my life when I didn’t “follow the rules”.
I graduated highschool early to work full time and left home to get my own apartment.
Despite tracking for college, I chose to travel aimlessly around the country for three years instead.
I declined management positions because I preferred my freedom over stress and long hours.
These were simply choices I made as I felt my way through life. I didn’t know the answers and I didn’t have a real direction. I just tried to follow what felt right, despite how confusing it felt at times.
What I’ve come to learn is that is exactly what I was designed to do.
As a line 6 profile* in Human Design, my first 30 years would look like a line 3 profile: stumbling though a trial-and-error type of life, making mistakes creating experiences, and basically bumping my way through life. Well, I certainly lived up to THAT!
And now, in the third phase of my line 6 life, I get to take all those experiences I gathered in the first phase, and the lessons I integrated in the second phase, and share them as wise wisdom. I get to be that “what not to do” meme! Just kidding, sort of. I get to share what worked for me, but more importantly, share the benefits of living life on your terms, living and experimenting in your design regardless of what society expects of you.
Over the past 50 years I’ve witnessed society’s measuring sticks go from simple airbrushed magazine glossies to full-blown AI influenced fantasies. These work and life standards are not only impossible to achieve, but don’t fit most people’s natural designs and it’s creating a society where burnout is the norm and quality of life is all but lost.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on society’s influence, stress and burnout, and remembering who we are in a world telling us to be something else.
*Want to learn more about Human Design profiles? Check out these two podcast episodes: Profiles 1 Profiles 2
Here are some past posts on learning how to be you despite society’s expectations:
Removing the Masks
My memories of Halloweens past consist of the struggle to see and breathe behind a plastic mask with a tiny holes for eyes and mouth and tripping over the hem of the costume dress, only to have it torn to shreds by night’s end.
Being You in a World That Tells You to Be Someone Else
For much of my life, I struggled with my self-worth. I had so many different interests, but if I didn’t focus on just one, I’d never be successful. This week we’re talking about that struggle of being yourself in a world that tells you to be something else.
